PASTOR'S PENS:

SERMON SERIES:
Kingdom PrinciplesFollowing Jesus
Earthly Cross
His Name Is
Apostles Creed
Dealing with Feelings
Jonah
Get Real
Promised Land Living

Grace Church
257 Kendall Street
Burlington, WI 53105

(262) 763-3021

PASTOR'S PENS 2008

September 14th “Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.”                                                                                                                              Mother Teresa As I look back, it’s hard for me to believe that I’ve been involved at some level of vocational ministry since the summer of 1977. With my family background I’ve always felt that the Lord prepared me for much of the pain and trauma of ministry so that it does not tend to shake me up...or keep me awake at night. But there are times, when you know that you’re a pastor, because of a sleepless night. Or, the pain that you are seeking to help someone else walk through is so pervasiveand so rampant, that you can’t help but be overwhelmed by it yourself.                 Sunday night was one of those situations that kept me up much of the night. And even now, days later, it is still weighing heavily on me.                 I was called out to minister to an elderly woman who’s daughter had died, most likely of a heart attack, as they were out for dinner together at a local restaurant. The daughter was in her late fifties and moved to Burlington a few years ago from the Chicago area. At the time she’d also moved her elderly mother here and arranged for her Mom to live in one of the local retirement housing units. She would come and take Mom to the grocery store, doctor, etc., and made sure that Mom’s needs were taken care of.                 Mom is now nearly 90. As I rushed into ER the other night, I saw her but she was so small, so frail...so alone, that it didn’t register that this was who I had been called out to minister to. Though she had two other sons and a grandson (the deceased woman’s son), the hospital staff and authorities were having difficulty finding someone to help and minister to “Mom.” I ended up returning her to her apartment and we went through drawers together to locate phone numbers of her other children and grandson. And even then, though it was late at night, though I was calling from the phone in her apartment, it took some time to finally get one of them to return the call...even though we were calling both land lines and cell phones.                 My Dad will turn 91 this year. If he called me late at night or if a hospital or local authorities called me about him, particularly if they had called my cell phone which most of us have with us 24/7, I would have responded immediately. Yet, it was hours before we could locate anyone to minister to this poor, lonely woman.                 About a year ago I was involved in a similar situation. A man had died in his home but had probably been dead a week or two before anyone knew it. As I recall, it was his mail carrier who noticed that the mail was not being picked up and that the car had not moved.                 In our culture where folk move from State to State and job to job, we have become a nation of transits. On top of that we switch churches haphazardly with a consumer mentality rather than a Kingdom passion. And sadly, relationships are not highly valued. We convince ourselves that we can always make new friends and build new relationships.  But many people find themselves in mid-life, even in the church, without any significant friends outside of their own families. They’ve just made too many moves to put down real roots. And if there is a family rift or just a relocation of their children, these folk find themselves even more alone.                 In America we value our jobs, our toys, our hobbies but often don’t value those things that really matter. One is a deep relationship with God and the other is a deep relationship with others. God has designed us for community. In the early church they called each other “brother” and “sister” because they realized the vital need of “one anotherness.”                 It’s important to have a healthy marriage and family. We forget, though, that it is also important to have healthy relationships with other believers. It’s not enough to just know their names and the general stuff. We need to really know each other – the hurts, joys, burdens, prayer requests, strengths and weaknesses. But you have to work to build those kinds of relationships. You have to take risks to pull back the masks and also make yourself accountable. The rewards are well worth it. That’s what ABFs and small groups are about; the building of a closer relationship to God and with one another.                 Like anything, you will only get out of it what you put into it. Take it from me...there are a lot of lonely folk out there. I meet them every day. But for the believer to whom God has given the local church and a forever family, it is truly a tragedy to be one of them!                 Dear friend, please don’t be a lonely statistic. Don’t be like this 90 year old: during a crisis having to be ministered to by a stranger because you have no one else who cares.  You never took the time to cultivate what God had given you.  Don’t wait for someone to reach out to you - be the one reaching out. Look for opportunities to minister and serve, and you will never lack for relationships and those who truly love and care for you!