257 Kendall Street
Burlington, WI 53105
(262) 763-3021
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We have purchased land on Highways A & W and are planning to build soon! Drive by and take a look at our future home!
“Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.”
Lin Yü-tang
May 9th, 2010
Bear with me if I’m a tad sentimental. This past Wednesday was our daughter Charity’s 25th birthday. Wow!! Where have the years gone? Jane and I know that we are very blessed with our children and thankfully, all three know the Lord and have a heart for God! Believe me, that’s God’s grace, not because of superior parenting.
Something, though, has happened during the last few decades, and it’s not just in a pagan world, it’s a worldview that has also contaminated the Church. We have lost God’s value of motherhood. A Biblical worldview of fatherhood was lost long before that but the one value that we seemed to be able to cling to was the precious value of motherhood. I’m not sure how or why we lost it. Maybe it was radical feminism? Or, abortion? Or perhaps even the continual assault of materialism, consumerism and secularism? I’ll leave the cause to Christian historians and sociologists to determine, I just know that it’s been lost.
The signs are rather subtle. It’s things like an almost scandalous attitude toward a family that has decided to have more than one or two children. It’s the response when someone shares that they are expecting. The past response was, “Wow! That’s great!” Frequently the response today is, “What are you going to do?” as if the person has announced that they have Bubonic Plague or some other incurable malady. It’s seen in the attitudes and seemingly perpetual complaining of young mothers about their children. Some have a martyr’s complex, as if they are suffering some horrible fate in being saddled with the care of children whose needs seem to be insatiable. It’s seen in our value of career over parenting; things over tykes; me-time over family time. Interestingly, in a day when we do more of our own work on our homes than in past generations (Menard’s, Home Depot and Lowe’s have made a mint off of this trend), we are quick to subcontract out the raising of our children. Too often we’d rather work on that home improvement project instead of an improvement in the home.
So what can we do to counter this unbiblical trend toward motherhood? How can we encourage a Biblical worldview toward being a Mom?
Value motherhood yourself. See children as gifts from God and say so...continually, even when they are past the “cute stage.” Speak highly of the value of children and the joy of being a parent. Sadly, our culture values externals – how one appears, abilities, etc. God values the inner man, the heart. Make sure that you value what God values.
Be careful, too, in how you respond to children who are misbehaving. All kids misbehave (so do adults). Remember, too, that children are not necessarily a reflection on their parents. The first parent to have naughty kids was God. There are often issues going on behind the scenes that we are totally unaware of in both the child’s and parent’s lives.
Take a healthy dose of reality. I always laugh when I hear an older adult say, “Well, our kids never did....” Yeah, they probably did. You just have either forgotten or didn’t even know it. I had a dear friend in the ministry who would talk about his now adult children as if they were angelic when they were children. They weren’t, I ran with them. They had that terrible condition called depravity that we all have.
Pray for young Moms. Uphold young Moms in prayer. If you have a relationship with them, let them know that you are praying for them. Even encourage them to give you a call if they feel the need for extra prayer support...and keep what they share in confidence.
Be an encourager. When their child does well, when their child exhibits spiritual aptitude or fruit, let both the parents and child know. If a child misbehaves, we often let the parents know. Shouldn’t we then let them know when the child does well? If you see a Mom who is struggling, seek to encourage her. Often, all they need is a listening ear and a small dose of perspective.
Help. Put feet, hands and time to your encouragement. When our children were young, we had some folk here at church who would periodically care for them for us, just to give us a small break or so that we could minister to others. I’m so thankful for the folk that we have that do that now!! Others may have never thought of this. It means the world, though, to a struggling mother. And while it’s great to help and care for our own grandchildren, let’s also remember to care for the needs of those in our church family as well.
Measure your own view of children against Scripture. Our worldview needs to be so Biblical that our blood is nearly “bibline.” Our culture often relegates mothers to the status of constant abject failure in a culture driven by consumerism and workaholism. There are few kudos in being a mother, only in being other things - such as thin, successful, or the boss - despite being a mother. Motherhood is seen as a form of a handicap.
As one starts to see motherhood from God’s perspective, hearts will change, old thinking will fall away and freedom can be gained to enjoy motherhood. Motherhood is vital to God. The first relationship that God established was the marriage relationship and one of its primary purposes was to multiply. God’s first task to Adam and Eve was to fill the earth and subdue it. This means, to have a family, to raise the next generation for the glory of God. Our purpose is to bring glory to God in all that we do. God wants every aspect of our life to glorify Him – our family, our home, every relationship, and every activity. God is also pruning us so that we produce more fruit. He does this through both parenting and marriage. What better place to lop off some of our rough spots than in the context of the home so we produce more spiritual fruit.
God created the family. He created mothers. He values them...do we?
